We hear all the time that you can't drop your worries and tensions when you get into bed. What that really means is that you don't care. Many of us feel that we cannot afford to relax, even when we go to bed, because of world conditions, or because of some personal problem that remains unresolved.
Worries And Sleep
If you could settle world conditions by tensing your brow, or solve your personal problems by clenching your teeth, I would be the last to recommend that you stop doing these things.
But You Can't
On the other hand, you can't learn to drop your worries and cares when you go to bed by convincing yourself that you have a right to do so. You must make the decision to drop your worries - with no conditions.
Many people punish themselves with insomnia. If you have made a mistake - even a grievous one - punishing yourself with insomnia will not erase it. If you have made such a mistake, you will need physical energy and a clear head if you are going to try to correct it the next day.
Sleep and relaxation can help repair the damage, insomnia can't.
If you made a mistake during the day, be man or woman enough to accept the fact that you made a mistake. Don't try to erase it or cover it up by self-punishment. If you admit the mistake to yourself, you will go to sleep.
Must everyone think you are perfect? Are you to good ever to make a mistake? Accept the fact that you may be less than perfect. Using insomnia as self-punishment comes from the egotistic desire to regard our selves as perfect, as incapable of making mistakes.
The unconscious reasons something like this: I made a mistake. But I cannot accept this fact. I cannot admit it to myself or to others. I learned in childhood that punishment erases a mistake and makes everything all right again. I will punish myself, erase the mistake, and save myself from the painful experience of having to acknowledge myself as less than perfect.
I have found that the athlete who fails a try and tries to convince the coach, and himself, that he is sorry, or that it wasn't his fault, is much more likely to make another costly mistake, than the person who accepts his mistake without undue self-recrimination, and studies it objectively to see what he did wrong so that he can avoid making the same mistake a second time.
In the first instance, the focus is on the self. The person who suffers from the mistake is concerned primarily with his own ego; the person who learns from the mistake is concerned primarily with the situation and the ways of correcting it.
Sleeping pills may be a popular insomnia cure but you know they are not the best insomnia cure. Letting go of your worries might take some practice but you can easily learn to relax away you tensions and stop interfering with nature.
Other related pages at Relax and Sleep